I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I see more hoeing in ur future
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