I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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