I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
