I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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