He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
