i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize