you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
