Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
