Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize