we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
