Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry sparkimus hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.

(515): View more from Iowa

I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.

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(770): View more from Georgia

FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot

(770): View more from Georgia

Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.

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(613): View more from Ontario

I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.

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(716): View more from New York

Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.

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