wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
