Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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