i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
