yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
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