part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
