so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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