The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
