Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
