All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
