I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
He uses pillows to masturbate.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
