Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
