Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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