the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
