Midget sex pt 2 tonight
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
