She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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