yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
