VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
