and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
