people are starting to question the shark bite story
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
