hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Randomize
