Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
