I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Randomize