i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize