wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Do you have feelings for this penis?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
