Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
there is glitter all over my balls
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
