i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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