Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
