She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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