my vag is so smooth its legendary
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
