brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
You were trust falling into bushes
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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