Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
