seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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