he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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