Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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