I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize