your room smells of hookers.
And success
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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