Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
