Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Boobs are out for the taking
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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