He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
